Google revealed the top ten 2015 Google searches for “how to” and the number one search was “how to handle stress!”
Stress can be defined as an internal response to an external stimulus. Stress management is keeping the wear and tear on the body and soul to a level that nothing wears out before it is supposed to! We all experience stress – in fact, life would be boring without some stress. Some people even seek stress – they ride roller coasters, watch horror films, or maybe skydive. We have different levels of stress that we enjoy and tolerate. But too much stress over too long a time wears us out – physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
Research indicates that our ability to predict or control stress influences how much distress we experience. The accountant knows that tax preparation time is stressful and time limited (predict). Getting a good night’s sleep before an eventful workday can allow us to feel less stressed (control).
Our thoughts determine what we feel and lead to or actions (or inactions).
Thought > emotion > behavior
Negative thoughts can control us and lead to intermittent or chronic stress. I view negative thoughts as a gremlin in our head that says: ‘you must, you can’t, you shouldn’t’ and myriad other thoughts. Notice how often it says “you”. ‘You must be the perfect parent/you must rear the perfect child/you can’t say ‘no’/your boss will fire you if you don’t……”
I don’t believe in spending years in therapy to determine where these gremlin messages came from. We all know they came from schooling, family, society, and the media. In cognitive behavioral therapy the important thing to understand is that we all have these gremlin thoughts and what to do about them is what is most important.
Thus my slogan: don’t believe everything you think!
I can help you to identify and correct these gremlin thoughts and find true statements from your true voice, that little voice that when nurtured allows us to live a more stress free life. Over time, with consistent practice, the gremlin becomes smaller and less frequent. Our confidence increases, our self-esteem raises, we enjoy life more and our relationships improve.
