In couples counseling the ‘relationship’ is the client, not each individual person. It is like a third person in the room. In individual counseling we talk about issues and the client goes back to the environment and implements change. In couples counseling real change occurs in the office, the real world is present. This promotes much faster growth and change.
The most common difficulties are communication, trust, infidelity and betrayal, financial problems, sex and intimacy issues, parenting and in-laws. Infidelity takes many forms, including non-physical/ romantic and online.
I have a great history of helping couples even when one refuses to come to counseling. I am skilled at teaching how to talk so your partner will hear you and how to listen to what your partner is saying or not saying, how to effectively argue and to learn about the differences between men and women.
I am trained in the John Gottman, Ph.D. Level 1 Clinical Training: (The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, The Relationship Cure, What Makes Love Last, The Men’s Guide to Women, A Couples Guide To Communication). Gottman writes about the ‘sound marital house’ and the importance is not so much how couples communicate or argue but how they make up, the ability to repair difficulties.
I am a Certified Facilitator in Prepare/Enrich Building Strong Marriages: The program utilizes an online, in depth, individualized couples assessment as a starting point for professional sessions to reveal and interpret relationship strengths and areas for development. There are assessments to fit every kind of relationship, married, living together, with children and cultural. This is not a self-study program.
Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman: There are only a few self-help books that I can recommend and this is one of them. Chapman says that we have five different ways that each of us experience and give love: words of affirmation, quality time, touch, gifts, and acts of service. He generously offers a free, online assessment at: 5lovelanguages.com.
Attachment and Commitment in Couples: My most recent interests in marriage and couples work is influenced by the works of Dan Siegel, M.D. and Sue Johnson, Ed.D. Dr. Johnson believes that hurt is composed of anger, sadness and fear – the fear of being excluded, abandoned and rejected. For an interesting, self-help exploration I can recommend the free questionnaires on yourpersonality.net.
